Finding the Calm... or Thanksgiving with a Three-Week-Old Granddaughter

My mind!

My time!

I’ve been fast tracking,

by-passing the quiet cushion, skipping yoga.

Today I say, “I will go slow.”

The busy grandchildren have gone home.

No one to tend now, I light a candle,

study the graceful folds in Quan Yin’s gown

and sit

breathing in and out.

But my mind still scurries

here and there,

over the wonders, the snags,

re-tastes the joys of these past days,

burrows into the anxieties,

lists of things to do in the days to come.

So much, such big dreams.

Can we? Will we?

And my friends with troubles,

what can I say to them?

Breathe in.

Breathe out.

Finally my mind lights

not empty but caught in a moment,

when after being head cook,

sitting with my family around the Thanksgiving table,

I claim privileges and take the squirming baby.

Eating my dinner one handed

I rock and sooth her,

watch her settle into sleep across my lap.

As we eat and converse and laugh

I look down upon her tiny form,

the sweet profile of her baby face,

so relaxed,

so serene,

so peaceful,

so perfect.

Just remembering

I find myself in total bliss.